Every time I enter this beautiful space… this soon to be Yoga Bow… I am mixed with such complex feelings of excitement, gratitude and fear.
This space was meant for yoga, movement and community… and it thrived as Four Seasons Yoga for years before shutting down due to mis-management.
I can feel the history in the space, the good vibes all around, even as the construction workers tear apart the old to build us something fresh and new.
I liken this experience to my own body and my own yoga practice. Sometimes my old ways don’t work anymore. Perhaps I need to take a step into excitement, gratitude and fear to discover what is possible in my future.
The last few years of teaching yoga in various studios all over San Diego has been one of much happiness and heaviness. The pros of teaching yoga all over town are endless, but the cons were getting to me: not remembering students names nor making deep connections with them due to so many different people/places, lots of time and energy spent driving from studio to studio every day, disconnection from other yoga teachers because I rarely had the time to stick around and take their classes, and an overall frustration with not feeling like I was growing as an instructor, but rather just going through the motions to follow the yoga rules and keep people happy.
I couldn’t help but take this opportunity when it arose – I almost felt like I wasn’t even deciding… it was more like I was being pushed by the ‘universe’ even though I was (and still am) very scared and worried about the whole damn thing.
So what keeps me going?
1 – My yoga students and their excitement they share when I tell them that I am opening Yoga Bow. (It surprises me every time – I honestly expect people to say “what… you?… naw…. that’s a bad idea…” but not one person has said that to me yet! That must be a good sign.)
2 – My support network of family and friends (you know who you are).
3 – My yoga practice and passion for being the best teacher around that I can be for my students (no ego!).
4 – The possibility that the scary unknown could be absolutely amazing.
Something I’ve learned trying to be decent at rock climbing over the years is that going into the unknown is scary, especially when your lead climbing and you can’t see where you’re supposed to go to get to safety… and yet somehow I always have. Either my intuition or a friend yelling beta at me will help me find my way. And the reward is complete ecstasy… to know that I went into a dark, scary and unknown place to see what might take place on the other side.
I hope you’ll join me.